Last week Frido came home from 9 days of crazy travel between Tokyo and Singapore. He stopped by Tokyo for two nights to gather inspiration for Baum-kuchen then taught really cool creativity class at MBA school in Singapore. (I know. He is amazing)
We have a fairly predictable daily routine with us and kids... and it's really rare that both of us are not present in the late afternoon, dinner... through kid's bedtime routine. He also takes just as many hours of responsibility as I do as girls' main caregiver at home from dropping-off, picking up Satchi at her preschool, watching them in the afternoon, making dinner... So not having him for more than a week really freaked me out. I was especially worried about the girls' bedtime since they need so much more support at the time and we usually split... me with Satchi and Coco with Frido.
Anyways... we did survive the 9 days without major meltdown (including bedtime) and I am thankful for this one particular quote that helped me get through those days.
It was a quote from Hobonichi diary page. I was trying to find a good way of translating this... and the best I can think of is..., "the normal state of mind brings happiness." I really liked the quote because it didn't tell me to be "peaceful", "meditated", "quiet" or "happy"... instead just "be normal". So for the entire week, I kept myself and the way I interacted with Satchi and Coco constant. When I felt really excited, I shared my feelings in a normal way... instead of overwhelmingly bubbly and smiley way. When something made me feel upset, I also shared it using a normal tone of voice. I felt like I was slightly decaffeinated but I noticed that they really needed me to be solid, steady and predictable because not having Frido around us was so different from our usual everyday.
We also talked about good news and bad news about Fridos' travel. A bad news is... that we would miss him. A good news is that he would come back and while he was away, three of us could work together as a team. I wanted to make sure that I let them know that it's okay to miss someone special (because we really did) instead of masking the feeling... but also wanted to give them a way to deal with the feeling. I also told them that things will be different so let's not pretend like we're going to do everything the same way. As a result we found a new way of getting through the bedtime, had a lot of friends over, visited my parents and did tons of fun things like going to indoor trampoline park, eating little baby sushi and visiting aquarium.
Needless to say... we were SO GLAD to have Frido back home but at the same time... super proud to have gone through those days without crazy major meltdown at home;)